Do you have a daughter? Here are my top tips for how to raise a strong and confident daughter who recognizes her full potential. This post is written in partnership with Matilda Jane Clothing. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
Raising girls isn’t easy. I remember the moment that I found out we were having a daughter. I was terrified.
Do you remember what it was like to be a little girl? I know that it was no easy task raising me. What I do know is that as a little girl, I learned how to be more confident from the women in my family. I also learned what it was like to have insecurities. Growing up, everyone always ignored theirs. Now as a mom, it’s my turn to raise a confident girl. As a mom, it’s my job to help build my daughter’s confidence and help her to look at her body image positively.
T is a sparkly firecracker. She has a spirit that nothing can hinder. I’ve honestly never seen someone with such an amazing personality. There are very few things that can get her down. If you’ve got a daughter, here are a few tips for how to raise a confident daughter.
How to Raise a Confident Daughter
1. Show your daughter what it’s like to be confident
As much as you’d like for your daughters to not follow in your footsteps, they are. One of the first things that you want to do if you want your daughters to be confident is to show them how. Talk to them about what confidence means and what it looks like. Show them how you display confidence on a daily basis. As a mom, you’re one of the biggest influences in her life. Did you know that research shows in a recent study, 63% of girls reported that their biggest role model was their mom.
2. Allow your daughter to express her feelings
We talk a lot about feelings in our home. I grew up in a house where kids were seen and not heard. We weren’t allowed to voice our opinions and we never talked about feelings. When I became a Mom, I knew I wanted to change that. I wanted my daughter to acknowledge her feelings and speak openly about them. We encourage our daughter to express her feelings anytime. If there was ever a feeling that she wasn’t sure of, we could talk through it together. By speaking together about her feelings, it allows her to be more confident about her experiences and the decisions she makes.
3. Give her the freedom to pick out her own clothes
This one is a big one. For a lot of girls, getting dressed every morning plays a big part in their confidence building. Have you ever heard the saying “if you look good, you feel good.” It’s true. We let T pick out her outfits every single day. Sometimes she asks us for help with matching or what the weather is like so that she can make a better informed decision but for the most part, it’s all her. By allowing her to make that choice every morning, we’re reinforcing that we trust her decisions which in turn builds her confidence.
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4. Ensure that she has positive female role models
Even though you’re an amazing mama, you can’t do it all and you can’t be there all the time. You know those moments when she’s in school or when you’re away on a work trip? Make sure that there is a positive female role model that is showing her what it’s like to be a confident female. T has always had amazing teachers, gymnastics coaches, and Girl Scouts leaders. She can look at these women and see what it’s like to be confident in their careers and the activities they love. Positive female role models are so important in a girls life.
5. Participate in an activity that builds confidence
Confidence building activities are a lot of fun and very beneficial. Something as simple as a daily self-esteem affirmation or keeping a daily journal of one thing that you’re proud of every day will help to build confidence.
6. Let her play team sports
Team sports is a great way to get your daughter around other girls her age who are working on building their confidence too. Not only does it get her around her peers, it allows her to build her strength and test her limits. Sports will challenger her. She’ll push herself and maybe even fail a couple of times. Her failures will lead to lessons and having to problem solve. Team sports can help girls learn to work together and build resilience.
7. Show interest in her schoolwork
A fun way to build confidence is to allow your daughter to teach you what she’s learning in school. Skip asking questions about homework and take a seat at the learning table. Let her show you how excited she is about all of the concepts that she’s learning in school and create a meaningful conversation around it.
8. Believe in her
The most important thing you can do when trying to raise a daughter with confidence is to believe in her. Tell her how much you believe in her and repeat it often. Your daughter needs to hear that you believe in her especially during those middle school years which are the toughest. A small reminder once in a while is all it takes. Remind her when she’s having a tough time and even when she’s not.
9. Give her her own space
When we bought our first home, we knew that it would be important to create a space just for T that she could decorate and make her own. We gave her free reign when it came to picking the colors and decorating her room. Her tween room became an oasis and safe space for her.
Do you have any tips for how to raise a daughter with confidence?
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SHELLEY R KING says
I have boys but I have passed this along to my sister. I have watched my sister as a single mom struggle so much. We have all come together to help her over the years and I see an amazing young lady in my niece. I try to tell my sister all the time she is doing a great job. I hope this read helps her.
Bianca Dottin says
It really takes a village to raise kids. I bet your sister is so thankful that she has your help and your niece will turn about to be an amazing woman.
Nadalie Bardo says
OMG, this is the best post ever! Loving the beautiful photos of you and your daughter and this message of empowerment. I so admire parents who are so aware of the importance of raising strong and confident children.
Bianca Dottin says
Thank you so much!
Kim @ Berly's Kitchen says
First of all, your daughter is adorable and looks so confident in the photos. It’s obvious that you’re doing a great job. These tips/guidelines are great. As parents, sometimes we lose track of the little things during the hustle and bustle, so it’s easy to over the small stuff when raising confident and self-reliant children. This post really breaks it down.
Bianca Dottin says
She is so confident! It’s so easy to lose track of everything but we try to keep our focus on raising her.
Catalina says
Your tips are awesome. I have two daughters myself and I would like to raise two confident women. I really need to re-read this post one in a month to remember these important steps that will help them to be better women! Thanks!